(to the tune of, and with apologies to, Bob Dylan's original)
1. Santa's at the north pole
Mixing up the present lists
Rudolf's at the punch bowl
Getting seasonably pissed
The man in the red coat
Beard out, hat off
Says he's got a full sled
Your gift could fall off
Look out, kid
Are you naughty or good?
He knows which
You know that's understood
You better not shout or cry
I'm telling you why
The man in the fur-trimmed hat
And a double chin
Wants a sherry left out
You only got gin.
